Notice: This is meant as a comedy skit idea. In no way am I serious about any of this.
A long time ago, I started dreaming of being on Saturday Night Live. I mean, if Andy Sandberg can do it, I’ll be fine. Ah-Bazinga Burn Sandberg. I’ve always had a natural talent for the stage. I was in a few plays during grade school. In 3rd grade, I was Timmy the Tuna. That should give you an idea of my IMDB credentials and why I get a rejection letter from their firstname.lastname@example.org email address. Once I was even accepted into a Gifted and Talented academy program in the 4th grade. Hate to say it, but the gifted and talented program in Reno made me think I was accepted to the “Special” Gifted and talented program. I lied. It’s way worse. Regardless, I’m completely comfortable being on stage or in front of audience giving a presentation. See my WordPress.tv video’s s proof. If you’ve ever had the feeling that you could do something like be on stage, you know that your next thought is “What would I do to make it better / different / better”? And that’s where I am.
Your first few SNL Skit ideas always start off bad
My first couple of idea’s for an SNL SKIT were kind of funny. To me at least. I’ll give you the gist. My first idea was to have a old ruined down church with a sign out front that said AUTO PARTS STORE. This church was located on a lonely road between two major cities. It’s a popular spot where vehicles break down. Hence why it’s an auto prats store. Now here is where the joke comes in. It’s not so much an auto parts store as it is two guys who stole a Honda Civic and are selling the parts off it. So naturally, the first couple people need parts for other cars. They get moved along. Then comes in a customer that needs a water pump for a Honda Civic. They’re in luck because our two guys still have it on the car. So both sides start to negotiate a price for the water pump. Here is the plot twist. When they settle on a price, one of our guys drops some news that they have to wait until the water pump is easily available to access. Meaning that our two guys are only selling things on top first. As they get down to the core of the motor, they can sell the deeper insides of the motor. I wanted to take it a step further. I wanted a small fade out and fade in to resemble that time has passed. SO here is our two guys. The clients come back and the motor is finally at the point to where the water pump is available to access. They work on a price and agree. One of our guys wheels out a cart, from stage left, full of papers that needed to be signed for the warranty. You can imagine the rest, I believe.
My second idea was something pretty simple. I deal with customer service calls and emails all day. I thought that a funny SNL Skit would be a guy who is alone at the office on a Saturday Morning. Say 5:45 am. There are a few people there so some dialogue can happen. The guy is standing at a fax machine and the fax machine is not working. There is a close up shot of the fax machine that clearly reads “For Technical Support Please Call 555-555-5555”. So the guy grabs a giant office phone. You know the ones from the 80’s? One of those. We see and hear him making the call. Two seconds go buy and then all we hear is that annoying sound you hear when you call a Fax machine. The guy thinks for a few moments. Maybe he dialed a wrong number. Calls again. Fax Machine Sound plays. So on and so on. It’s simple but you’d get the point.
The Great Idea I Had For an SNL Skit
The other day I was thinking about how funny it would be to build a website for a used car dealership that only sold used cars that were used in a failed terrorist attempt to blow something up. Yeah, I’m going there. That’s why there is a notice at the top of this blog.
Think about it for a second. You never see a terrorist driving a new $100,000 Escalade. It’s usually some beat up old car that was taped together by wood glue and string. So I wanted to make a SNL Skit that was a digital short. You know, like “I’m on a a boat” and “Jizz in my pants”. It’s a car commercial that shows a guy trying to sell used terrorist cars from previous usage. If the car has fire damage, I think it’s a selling point. The sign could read “Catches on fire easy”. In the world of terrorists and car bombings, I think that a car that has a proven track record of catching fire would be a sales point and not a deterring factor. A car with holes in it could read as “Great for hiding in plain sight”.
Anyways. I’m not saying that terrorist are good, or a reason to laugh. It’s a serious problem that our soldiers have to deal with and I hope they all return safe and sound. Have a great day!